When our duty is so plainly marked out, why do so many church members go contrary to a plain "Thus saith the Lord," and speak of their difficulties to those who know nothing in regard to them or in regard to those whom these difficulties concern? Jesus the great Teacher, has told us what our duty is. Our gifts, our prayers are not acceptable to God while we leave this duty undone, and let the poison of envy, evil-surmising, and jealousy, take possession of our souls, and spoil our union and happiness. Oh, how much unhappiness would be spared, and how many evil thoughts would be quenched, if believers would take up the work that Christ has said must be done to prevent evil thinking and evil speaking.
A few words of explanation might change entirely the views of those who have been at variance, cherishing bitter feelings. We cannot be obedient to the law of God until we put out of the mind all differences, until we allow our hearts to be softened and subdued by the Spirit of Christ. Our prayers are hindered by our pride of heart, by our refusal to confess faults and to remove wrong impressions.
We are to make every effort in our power to remove every stumbling block from before the feet of our neighbor or our brother. My son [Edson], make every concession that it is possible for you to make. Do not leave on a suffering mind a misconception that an advance in humiliation and tenderhearted interest would remove. Satan will be sure to come to that mind with the temptation to misconstrue and to make a mountain out of a molehill. A mind that easily stumbles over hurt feelings will conjure up mistaken ideas of all kinds.
The Lord Jesus has given special directions as to what each of His "little children" is to do. When we pray, "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those that trespass against us," do we do our part to answer this prayer? . . . If our brother has ought against us, we are to leave on the altar the gift we have brought to God, and be reconciled to our brother. Then we are to come and offer our gift. This is the only way in which we can keep in our hearts the peace of God.--Letter 12, Jan. 11, 1903, to Edson White. TDG 19
Every endowment of grace and power and efficiency has been liberally provided.... to give to the world the impression that their faith is not a dominating power in their lives is to greatly dishonor God. OFC 322
Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. Matthew 5:23-24 (King James Version)